I don't know anymore

sometimes I wonder what is to become of my life. Obviously nothing good so far. it doesn't seem to be going anywhere fast. everything I start, is finished, but not in the way i'd like it to be. this is how it always ends.
always. i'm left, hurt, and they don't care what they've done.
it just amazes me how one day, you are so obsessed with something, can't go a day without it. and the next, you can't spend a day with it, you need to get away fast.
i don't think i've fealt this before. it's a weird feeling. somewhat relief, but then sadness. bittersweet.
all i can say is, I need my friends to get this off of my mind. cuz right now, i'm sick, and it leaves me just laying in bed, thinking about it all day. not fun. ugh.